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Relationships First

Episode 1: Relationships Are All There Is

September 27, 2018

In this episode of Relationships First, Bill and Molly talk through the idea that everything in the Universe exists in relationship to everything else. And, nothing is in isolation. How does this apply to the real estate industry?

Bill: This is Bill Risser.

Molly: And Molly McKinley, and we're talking relationships.

Bill: All kinds of relationships, from starting new ones to nurturing existing ones over time.

Molly: And each week, we'll highlight something that inspires.

Bill: Or triggers us.

Molly: To help get to the root of why relationships are key to our happiness and success.

Bill: Hey everybody. Welcome to episode one of Relationships First. I'm so excited. Molly, how are you doing?

Molly: I am so good. What's funny about this is, we're sitting here at night, almost 9:30 at night, talking relationships, which is why we're doing this stinking podcasts, is because we were doing it anyway, right?

Bill: Yeah, you're right. I mean, we had how many phone calls, and how many late night conversations, talking about this very topic, about the industry that we both love. And I'm really excited to kind of memorialize these conversations. I think that's what I feel like we're doing.

Molly: Yeah, exactly. We're like, this is actually interesting stuff. We wish we were having this conversation and then others could contribute to it. So, that's sort of the reason why we're doing this.

Bill: Now, we have to probably identify, we're definitely two different people, right? We couldn't be more different. I'm just going to say that. Other than the fact that.

Molly: We're both wearing blue shirts and baseball caps.

Bill: Yeah.

Molly: And I should be wearing my black glasses. Maybe we're more similar than you think, Bill.

Bill: Maybe you're right. You're right. But you know, I'm this middle aged male. You're a Gen Y female. I'm gonna go with that.

Molly: Am I Gen Y? I don't know.

Bill: I'm gonna go with that. And you're a Yogini, am I right?

Molly: Yes.

Bill: Did I say that right?

Molly: You did. Yeah. A female yoga practitioner, yes.

Bill: Right. And I've never done yoga in my life.

Molly: We'll have to change that, yes.

Bill: Oh, I don't know about that. But we'll think about it. And I'm very analytical, very scientific. And you, while you have those skills, you would probably be a little bit more, I don't want to say star child. Help me out here.

Molly: A free spirit?

Bill: There ya go. That's it, right? So, it's going to be interesting. I think it's going to be an interesting dialogue between these two dynamics having this conversation. What do you think?

Molly: I totally agree. And you know, and this is an important reminder, too, that you don't always have to come from the same place to have successful conversations. So this is what it's all about.

Bill: Cool. Well, I'm gonna let you kind of kick off this first episode. We've sort of introduced ourselves to the the people that don't know us. But let's talk about, you found this great quote, which you want to talk about a great way to start talking about relationships. Why don't you read that?

Molly: I'm going to go super Zen on you. So Bill, let's see if you can.

Bill: All right.

Molly: All righty. So, "Relationships are all there is. Everything in the universe only exists because it is in relationship to everything else. Nothing exists in isolation. We have to stop pretending we are individuals that can go it alone." And that's a quote I found by Margaret Wheatley. And you know, as a yoga teacher, I read about a book a week. So, every other week is a yoga book, essentially, or some sort of, what do you want to call this? Like a spiritual text, if you will, right? I'm a hopeless wanderer. What is the right word? A seeker.

Bill: Ah, there you go. I was thinking of the hitch hiker's guide to the universe. I don't know if that represents.

Molly: No. Not wanderlust, but seeker.

Bill: Okay.

Molly: And yeah, so when I saw this, I was like, oh my gosh! This quote really is sort of an embodiment of this sort of seeker's guide to relationships, because it really is a connection that nothing exists in isolation. And I think that's a fundamental truth that people have either forgotten or have not learned. And maybe part of the reason why our society feels super disconnected, because we feel alone, but really there is nothing that's not connected in the universe. At least that's the way I see things, from a yoga perspective. So, is your jaw on the ground?

Bill: No.

Molly: How does Bill... What is your take on that quote?

Bill: So, you sent this quote over to review, and I saw it. And my first thought was, I went straight to the science of things, right?

Molly: That's awesome.

Bill: For every action there's a reaction. Nothing exists in a vac. All of these things kept coming to my mind, that you're right, from a purely Neil Degrasse Tyson point of view, this quote makes absolute sense. And then obviously, for me, the job is to then kind of tie that back around to how I live my life, how everybody lives their lives, and how sometimes you think I can do this, I'm on my own. But in all honesty, you never really are. Right?

Molly: You never are.

Bill: Even if it's not something that you're asking to have happen, things are happening, a lot of times beyond your control, that are affecting you. All of that relational activities don't necessarily have to be relationships. We think of relationships as great connections and wonderful opportunities to connect, but boy, the relationships of life are out there. And so, you're right. You're working on me, Molly. You're working on me. I thought that was a great way to start this conversation.

Molly: Yeah, I mean it really is. It's a big idea. And it is important to have this framework when we talk about relationships with people, because if you understand that everything relationally is connected, even the friendly smile that sparks an idea. It's just this, everything is so in flow with something else, and it's not, it's just not disconnected. And I feel like that is something that, when we think in isolation, we're often wrong. So, the big idea with relationships is not just people are connected, but thought is relationally connected. There is this sort of underlying energy flow that happens as well. And I don't want to get too space cadety, because I'm going to lose my straight cred here. And I mean, I have zero authority to be having this conversation.

Bill: Well, we both have that. Neither one of us have authority. I think that's the beauty of it.

Molly: Yes.

Bill: It's two people who live their lives the way we live them, obviously connecting with people. You're an amazing connector and collector of people and ideas. And I think that I try to do the same thing. And you know, we talked about, when we put this idea, the germination of this show. We wanted to have real, actual take aways for people to have at the end of the show, whether it was something they could actually do, or maybe something to ponder on. I think this feels like the first episode's going to be something like, we're hoping we opened a few eyes, and just said think about it. That word doesn't exist without all kinds of everything working together.

Molly: It is. I mean, and I just am even thinking of a spark or a seed of an idea. And if you were to trace the seed of an idea, it can go all the way back to something that happened in childhood. And then someone in a conversation sparks that memory, and then you're on a path or a course that can take you into an entirely different direction, or be that thing that sort of is the final puzzle piece for a project you're working on, or whatever that is. But it's just so interesting how the relationships of things are so connected. And when you're paying attention and listening, how incredibly intricate and beautiful it actually is.

Bill: I love that you used the word listening and relationships in the same sentence.

Molly: Right?

Bill: Because that's going to be a common reframe, I think, over time with what we're going to do here. And so, that's awesome. I think that's great. And you've been putting it in this bigger, broader sense. This had to start with you. You know that, right? Because that quote was probably not going to start from Bill. I'm just saying.

Molly: I know. Well I love it. Well, and I love that you're coming from the science perspective, right? And being analytical about things, because there's a gravity in that that is grounded, and it can take something like what I'm saying and twist it into words that someone else can relate to. And that's the relationship with us, of being able to see and turn a stone on, turn the stone and see different assets. So, that's the benefit of this conversation for me.

Bill: And I think the benefit of the conversations to come. I think that's really, like I said a little earlier. We're going to make this a relatively brief podcast. We're not going to go on for 30, 45 minutes, like some other podcasts we know about. Instead, I think we wanted to focus on 10, between 10 and 15 minutes of just really good, hopefully analysis, or ideas, other kinds of conversation starters or thought provoking things, so that when you're done with this little episode, maybe you're looking at something a different way that you didn't look at it before, right?

Molly: That's amazing. If we've done that, then we've done our job.

Bill: Cool. Well, I think, look. I think we've done a great job here. I'm going to pat ourselves on the back, and say, somehow I got through the metaphysical awesome opening quote that Molly dropped on me.

Molly: I am happy to put your out of your comfort zone, my friend.

Bill: It will be fun. It'll be a lot of fun. So Molly, I'll wrap this up. I'll just say, first of all, thank you so much for listening. We really are looking forward to kind of as we go through our daily routines, right Molly? Finding opportunities to share information about the world around us, the relationships. Obviously there might be a little bit of a focus on real estate. But I think what we're going to talk about, hopefully, kind of transcends a lot more than just that.

Molly: That's amazing. It's a fun topic to dive into.

Bill: I can't wait.

Molly: If you haven't sensed the hesitation in his voice, I am sensing it for you. So, this is all good.

Bill: Thank you for checking out the podcast. Thanks for listening.

Molly: And make sure to come back for episode two, because we are going to be having a conversation about the book, Never Eat Alone, by Keith Ferrazzi. And there's some interesting nuggets in there that have popped out to us. We look forward to having that conversation as well.